this is

somewhat funny

or inspiring

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I met the love of my...

I met the love of my life... she didn't.

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I've never met a Fri...

I've never met a Friday I didn't like!
Do you know the diff...

Do you know the difference between a guest towel and toilet paper? No. In that case, don't use our bathroom.
We all know Albert Einstein was a genius - But his brother Frank was a monster!
A mother caught her son zapping the other children with static electricity - so she grounded him.
My dad asked me which Metallica songs I know - I told him I only know one and nothing else matters.
I just got fired from my job as a taxi driver. It turns out people don't like it when you go the extra mile for them.
They say don't go grocery shopping while youre hungry. But it's been a week and I just keep getting hungrier.
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