I used to sell security alarms door to door, and I was really good at it. If no one was home, I would just leave a brochure on the kitchen table.
My girlfriend told me to take the spider out instead of killing it - We went and had some drinks. Cool guy, he wants to be a web developer.
Police arrested two kids yesterday, one was drinking battery acid, the other was eating fireworks. They charged one - and let the other one off.
Remember when plastic surgery was a taboo subject? Now you mention Botox and nobody raises an eyebrow.
I got so drunk last night - I walked across the dance floor to get another drink and won the dance contest.
I know I need to build up my fitness with exercise and good health, but at the same time my body is telling me, no whey.
My doctor has just diagnosed me with paranoia. Well, she didn't say it, but I know she was thinking it.